Sapporo Ichiban

I am finally embarking on a long awaited trip very soon. In my uncontainable excitement, it’s all I seem to be thinking about lately. So for brunch, I souped (pun intended) up my favorite instant ramen noodles. Though it should suffice for now, I cannot wait to taste the real deal.

From where I stand

I will always remember our first apartment for its beautiful view. I hope I never take it for granted. I am quiet by nature, and still to me, sunsets are one of those rare things that leave me wordless. Pictures, however, no matter how effectively captured cannot replace the feeling that overwhelms me only in the presence of the sun setting in the horizon. What a wonderful gift from God.

Antipasto

I love trying new food and new combinations of it. Thank the food channel, food blogs and instagram for perpetually keeping me salivating. Never in a million years would have I thought to eat deli meat without sliced bread, moreso with fruit. But brie, melons, figs, Spanish cured meats (chorizo, cantimpalo, serrano)—together on a plate, united and it tastes soo good. Not sure if it’s healthy, but there’s fruit in there.

Groceries 02

Time for another groceries run down. On the topic, have you ever watched Supermarket Sweep on the retro game show channel? The best for shits and giggles, and munchies at that. Eighties fashion galore, too. Anyways, Tuesday night we finally checked out the Mexican joint in our neighbourhood called Mariachi’s. I had the enchiladas with rice and salad and it was really good so I’m going to try and make some for dinner tonight. I have been looking for canned baby mandarins with no such luck. When I used to work at McDonald’s, they had a paint can size one used for salads. So when I saw these Dole packaged ones, I picked them up even though they cost $4. I was also feeling fancy and picked up antipasto deli meat to eat with figs and goat brie. A bottle of moscato would be even better. But figs, I’ve only started eating them this year. They’re sweet, bite sized, and a bit grainy but I like em. They are mentioned a lot in the Bible. And I have a fig scented candle that smells amazing, though the fruit didn’t smell like the candle one bit.

Clockwise from top: preserved baby mandarins, antipasto cured meats, shredded cheese, tortillas, Mexican chili powder, fresh figs, peeled garlic cloves, green bell pepper, white onions

things on the wall

I've always admired pictures of pictures on a wall, but have always been adverse to putting up stuff on my own wall thinking it will be an eyesore. Well adversity be damned and yay to things cliche and tacky. Following are the random stuff I've put up so far. Prints from tumblr, collages and paintings I painted.

that time i made oxtail

Next to sushi, my second favorite thing to eat is probably jerk chicken. There is a place downtown called The Ritz, which despite the name is actually one of those hole in the wall gems. Their lunch special which is chicken (jerk, bbq or fried), rice and peas and coleslaw is killer. Not to mention it is only $4.99 before 3pm. And I love, love, love how they ladle oxtail stew gravy on the rice. I have never ordered oxtail stew there before, but the gravy is amazing. I suppose I am the type to order the same thing all the time if I really like it so jerk chicken it always is. But I was feeling adventurous and was too excited to find browning sauce at the drug store (of all places) on the corner. So I made some one day, and will make some for dinner tonight. MY STOMACH IS SMILING =) Nothing like comfort food when on your period.

on feeling inadequate

ever since i was a teenager, i have developed the most terrible self-destructive habit of living life vicariously through other people via internet. i suppose it doesn't help that i have always been a loner. ironically, i am probably not alone in my circumstance, but it is depressing nonetheless. i have always envied people with better clothes, nicer bodies, prettier faces, richer parents, more friends, supportive boyfriends, closer siblings; optimistic, motivated and successful people with amazing personalities. in short, people with better lives (or any life at all) than me.

sometimes i feel as if by blood, i am fated to this doomed attitude towards life. i try to avoid feeling this way, and try to be thankful often, but there come points when i have to sit myself down and get my shit together.

i think my ultimate weakness is low self-esteem (ie. low confidence, feeling inadequate, wallowing in self-pity, inability to persevere). and with low self-esteem comes sloth, paralyzing laziness and cowardice to try, to do, to live, to not be afraid of change, of pain, of hurt, of rejection, of getting in trouble, of truly learning that life goes on. to not be afraid of everything, but instead be courageous, however stupid.

there is no one to blame but myself. because i, alone, made my choices, and i, alone, will make my decisions. i am responsible for my actions and its consequences. i am the CEO of my life, and right now my company is nearing bankrupt (figuratively and literally), but i have hope...

i refer to this quote every now and then, and each time i find a different meaning.

“The grass is not, in fact, always greener on the other side of the fence. No, not at all. Fences have nothing to do with it. The grass is greenest where it is watered. When crossing over fences, carry water with you and tend the grass wherever you may be.”

Outfit 001

So excited to wear my bobbys, but I've yet to spray it. I know it's nothing new, but I love classic denim and stripes. And a pop of red for that extra oomph.

3.1 Phillip Lim bag, Choies denim dungarees, Alexander Wang stripe tee, Isabel Marant  Bobby sneakers

Groceries 01

After going to the gym for a back to back classes of Body Flow and Body Jam, I picked up some groceries. Ever since I was little, I've always been fascinated with grocery shopping. From riding in grocery carts to the neat and colorful displays on each aisle. I thought it would be cool to start posting random grocery runs I make, Andy Warhol inspired.

Clockwise: Kraft Dinner, browning sauce, dish soap, sponge, tater tots, scotch bonnet pepper, apricots, bananas, peeled garlic cloves, canned mackarel

Making Jamaican oxtail stew tomorrow. Kraft Dinner, dish soap and tater tots were on sale! And I love canned fish.

hands holo

Yea you liked that Star Wars reference.

I first got my hands on Maybelline Colorshow, which sucked donkey balls because it was not holographic at all. Not even 0.001% so I don't know why they would advertise it as so.

After some googling, I ebayed Harp On It by Color Club.

Amazing. Yoda would be proud.

shoes happen

I just got the Isabel Marant Bobby sneakers in the mail. NO BIG DEAL XD.

Matches' packaging is one of the best I've seen. Is Jackson Pollock's family getting royalties on these?

Super duper fast shipping, too. But I'm disappointed that they offered free shipping 3 days after I ordered having emailed them for any current promo codes with no luck. I have emailed them again to see if they can refund me the £12 I paid.

THESE SHOES THOUGH.

Here they are on me =)

Where have you been all my life?

So after much prejudice to ereaders the last few years, I finally caved in. At last, unlimited bedside reading before sleep. No night lamp required, no getting yelled at by Gary to turn off the light. To have 3000 books with me wherever I go at the weight of a soda pop. It's really amazing. Glad I ventured to the dark side. The bonus sudoku game is a nice touch.

denim vest

After endless scouring in Value Village, malls, eBay, Etsy, the Levi's store itself... behold the perfect denim vest! Just the right color, fit and distress I've been looking for. But actually, it was a vintage Levi's girls denim jacket, which I promptly cut off the sleeves upon receipt in the mail. Now, if only I can translate this persistence into other aspects of my life.

On another note, it has been a technically challenging morning trying to upload the following images. WHAT IS THIS 1995?! I only want vintage denim not vintage internet. But my persistence is apparently unstoppable, I was able to work around my shit modem by connecting via ethernet cord. Maybe sometimes old school is best. Word of advice, never get the Cisco DPC3825 modem from Rogers. If you can, don't do business with Rogers at all. But we in Canada don't  really have much choice, do we?

plants are friends

I have been on a planting rumpus lately. A couple of new friends include hen and chicks succulents and a bright pink and green coleus. Then this past weekend, I was obsessed with finding a jasmine plant. After much research online, I was determined. We walked down Mount Pleasant and checked every store that sold flowers and plants, but no luck. I was worried it is too late in the summer to find one. Then as a last resort, we checked our dedicated plant store at Yonge & Davisville and behold, they had 4 little potted jasmines for $3.99! I was expecting to pay at least $10 from what I've read online. I was so filled with joy that I bought two. Yesterday, the adbundant flower buds have started to bloom and the smell is just heavenly! I think I much prefer it to roses, except tuberoses (if it's even an actual rose specie). I love the scent of tuberose, probably as much as jasmine.

hen and chicks

coleus

jasmine bloom

On other garden news, I realized that our meyer lemon tree named Mike did not have any drainage hole whatsoever. Poor thing! I've had it in a deceivingly good looking yellow bucket decorative container it came in when we bought it for more than a month now. At first, it looked like it had 1 drainage hole on its bottom, but yesterday after closer observation, there was a black plastic lining restricting poor Mike to breathe. Immediately, I pulled him outta there and left him out in the balcony to get some fresh air. His temporary pot has 5 holes on its bottom, and the very same afternoon one of his buds opened up! I also gave him a cold refreshing mist of water on his leaves.

new meyer lemon bud

Do you know it's serious when you start referring to your plant as a male person?

No matter, his previous 5 buds that I manually pollinated indoors by a q-tip look like they're growing into green little fruitlings! I don't want to jinx it though because his other 1 fruit he came with is still the same size until now and never showed any development. Another little fruitling I have accidentally nipped off before.

meyer lemon fruitlings

About Tommy the roma tomato, he has 2 little fruits growing out! So happy. All these good news have motivated me to propagate everything I can, even a white lilac branch I brought in from the street. Another heavenly fragrance that's been intoxicating the air these days! I snipped the flowers and rubber banded them upside to dry in our bedroom. Now and then I get a nice waft when the breeze blows. I will update on any progress later, but I am not hoping too much. I have also propagated geraniums and money trees. And planted more basil and cilantro seeds. This time I will withhold from using Miracle-Gro on them as I am scared to eat the ones I used some on without knowing any better. 

roma tomato fruitlings

dried white lilac

propagating money tree in a recycled sapporo beer can

Lastly, I ordered several one too many seeds from eBay. I couldn't help myself, I never knew gardening is this amazing! It is such a joy to watch a living thing grow, to take care of it and is teaching me a lot about patience. For now, I am anticipating the arrival of the seeds including two types of jasmine, two types of peppers, three types of cactus (including lithops!), strawberry tomato, Indian ginseng and key lime!!! I am probably taking on too much on my plate, but I just want to get my feet wet and for $20 including shipping I'll take the chance.

Our window sill is full of pots filled with greens

...and pink!

I wasn't kidding about my planting fever!

Everything seems to be blooming right now! Geranium, green chili and even cilantro.

birth control and modelling paste

Had an interesting thing today...

Woke up early to go to my first gynocologist appointment. Had my first PAP test done. Did a pregnancy test as I am 1 week late. It's negative, whew! Finally got prescribed birth control at 25. Also got prescribed HPV vaccination, only when it was time to pay at the pharmacy it came out to $177! So I am like no biggie, my insurance will cover it. But lo and behold, I signed up for the ultra basic plan this year and they won't cover the first $1000 I spend on prescriptions, only thereafter. What is the logic in this?! Argh, health is priceless I suppose.

On the bright side, the gyno clinic turned out to be a family clinic as well. So there you have it, I finally have a family doctor (I was on a 6 month waiting list with another clinic). The doctor I saw was really kind as well, which is a very nice change from my old one from hell.

Other than that, I also picked up more gardening pots and shells and rocks at Dollarama. Tomorrow, I will go to Canadian Tire to pick up some soil and fertilizer. My little balcony garden experiment is really bringing me much joy! Despite my black thumb tendencies, I am learning and enjoying so much.

Also, I picked up modelling paste, brush soap and this magical thing called Kroma Crackle! I am excited to paint again! I even plan to paint my new plant pots!

The weather has been warm and humid, and really one musn't complain considering the long winter we go through every year. Life is beautiful and I am happy to be alive.

hats off

OK so my summer arsenal is definitely complete. Just scored this Brixton Tiller hat that's been sold out forever. Snagged the last one from Karmaloop, it was meant to be! Looks stunning on Natalie.

via Natalie Off Duty